We are back!

The Premier League is back this weekend and after some dramatic results in the 10 games, it’s time for those way too early and completely overdone hot takes.

With that in mind, here are seven of the ones you may have heard on the back of this first round of results.

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No Kane, No Pain – Spurs, Irons Win | 03:01

ARSENAL IS DISCONTINUED

“You are terrible, aren’t you? You just spent £ 50m on a defense attorney who can’t even defend? When will they learn? Honestly, mate, I hope you get off. It will be funny.”

Well Arsenal started very badly and the £ 50million spent on Ben White looks even more ridiculous now than it did then, but no, Arsenal is not going to be relegated. There are far too many weak teams in the league this season for that. Mikel Arteta has the potential to make a great young manager, but the club’s recruitment has consistently crippled him and his predecessors throughout his tenure. With Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang and Alexandre Lacazette, they have their two best players before their return and want to bring in a new number 10. You will survive.

BRENTFORD WILL FIND IN THE TOP SIX

“Wow, Brentford was so good. You are a real breath of fresh air. I’ve seen them in the championship for the past few seasons and I’ve always said that they would be a better fit for the Premier League. For me at least the six best this season. “

It was a great start for Brentford, but how often do we see a newly promoted player like Brazil make their Premier League debut? Arsenal was the perfect size fish to fry. A big club that turns around and shows its bellies at the first sign of a threat. There isn’t a single team that you haven’t seen against Arsenal at some point this season. Brentford did very well and they did their homework but they are still being dragged into some sort of relegation junk and survival is celebrated as harshly as a place in the top six.

POGBA UNIVERSALLY LEADS TO THE TITLE

“Pogba, mate. More like PogBACK … understood? No? Ahh, it doesn’t matter … Yes, no, I just think he’s finally showing his French form for his club, now Ole has let him play in his preferred position. They are sure to win the league. “

Paul Pogba was absolutely brilliant on Saturday night (AEST). The entire Manchester United team was there. They chewed up Leeds and spat it out and Pogba was the focus. We all hope we can enjoy these types of performances all year round, but unfortunately it will be a “believe it when we see it”. Pogba made so much promises during his time at Old Trafford and injuries and loss of form have bothered him. Manchester United are still not favorites despite such an impressive start with 37 games to go.

Reds & Red Devils take off to AMAZING starts | 01:44

LEEDS MUST BEAT BIELSA

“I don’t understand all the hype about this bucket-sitting fool. He did not learn! Why did Leeds give him another contract? He’s been hammered twice at Old Trafford and looks clueless how to defend himself. “

Anyone who says Marcelo Bielsa should be fired has obviously just seen his first football game. Manchester United would have torn most teams to pieces the way they played over the weekend and Bielsa is one of the brightest minds in the game. He brought Leeds back to the Premier League and then managed to make sure they weren’t even mentioned in the same sentence as “relegation” last year. He’ll make Leeds look even better this year. And it’s not that he won’t make it against Man United. Does anyone remember their Athletic Bilbao team coming to Old Trafford and getting Sir Alex Ferguson’s side out of the way?

TRACKS DON’T NEED HARRY KANE TOO!

“You should just sell Kane and sign more players. Imagine who you could get with £ 160 million! Spurs are better off without him, they just beat the champions for heaven’s sake! “

Yes, they beat the Premier League champions without Harry Kane and Spurs are still a good team without him. You’re just so much better with him. Everyone would miss Kane on his team, especially one who has been so dependent on his spurs for the past five years. Where would they have finished last year without him? Sitting back, defending, and then beating City with quick attackers on break is a surefire way to give yourself a chance to defeat them, even managers. Despite the narrative, this finding had nothing to do with Kane.

Ang Celtic rips out hearts | 01:40

WHY DID CITY BUY GREALISH? WHAT A WASTE OF MONEY

“Why did you sign him in the first place? You have a lot of players in that position! City will have to spend a lot of money on a striker, a central midfielder and a left full-back if they have a chance this season! “

Well, they signed him because he is one of the best players in the league and he will be successful under Pep Guardiola. They paid £ 100 million because that is the usual price for a player of this type who also happens to be English. Yes, they probably need a striker, but they won the league last year without a striker. Likewise without left-back. You have spent a lot of money in both positions, £ 50 million Benjamin Mendy and £ 27 million Gabriel Jesus. They still have a better team than last year and last year they won the league by a massive 12 points.

BENITEZ IS NOW BLOODY BLUE

“Yes Rafa, boy! I told you it was blue through and through. I heard his kids actually support Everton even though he manages Liverpool. It will be great when he returns to Anfield and Everton finally wins there. “

Rafael Benitez wasn’t the most popular date crossing the Merseyside threshold from Liverpool to Everton – especially after the ‘little clubs’ comments he’s made about them in the past. His signings so far haven’t been the most inspiring either, not as much catching up with players like Demarai Gray and Andros Townsend who were popular players the last time he ran the Premier League. But a 3-1 win over a Southampton team who sold out all their good players certainly made him a little more popular with Goodison Park believers. But he still has to do a lot more.

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